Morning After


with mild hangover and spin of my head I barely open my eyes and functioning.

how many drinks I drank last night, I cannot count.

as I slowly try to separate the lid between my eyes, the sun striking thru hard and shut my attempt.

slowly adapting to the light, I open my eyes.

And there you are,


Beside me, sleeping safe and sound.

With jawline hit and lip seal as it is has the world deepest secret.

and shut eyes of you, darling, cannot contain how it spark universe greatest sightseeing.

depth of abyss.


I run my fingers within your forehead,

all thru your ear, jaw, and chin.

I knocked it as it will open your sealed lip.


My linger finger dance to your nose,

touch it as it is part of art,

admiring every edges.


And down to your cupid bow.

I draw your lip all way thru.

Slowly spinning it all way thru.

I want to picturise and keep it in my memory.


I shiver as I remember what that lip capable of.

I lean in more and more to your open arm and bust my head to your bare chest.

Bare hard delicate chest.


My finger cannot contain the urge to do another dance, my apologize.

Finger tipping on your shoulder, firm shoulder.

It pacing its way to your arm so tender and smooth.

It moves as it doesn’t want to leave,

Because again, dear, it moves it way to memorize every edge of you.

Inch to inch, every nerve.


Down to your arm, my finger jump to your firm but delicate chest.

A place for my head to lay.

This one I don’t need to dance on as I remember every turn on it.


I snug deeper and deeper. I don’t care if the air starts to rare as I sink my nose to your embrace.

I just want to live here.


and then, a tender touch of soft lip land it kiss on my forehead.

I wake up the greek God and it throws the most suffocating smile I ever seen.


I shiver again.

As your hand caress my head,

dancing it off down to my shoulder.

And tipping to my arm,

my back,

and by one quick move I am in you. In your wrap.


Nothing but sheet and quilt on us.

And slowly creeping it way between us,

heat and sparks.

Of all rides we had before land of dream cathing in.


It’s up.

And we both about to start it again.


With the help of the playlist we made : Xx

Categories Xx

TOO GOOD : Tentang Ospek dan Nilai Operasi Edukasi berjalan di Indonesia

I usually hate Line Timeline because mostly, meh. Isu pilkada, LGBT, dan comment war yang… Sudahlah tak berujung.
But this, I glad to crash into. Tentang bagaimana sih, Ospek dan ‘penanaman nilai’ nya serta sistem edukasi Indonesia.
Too much I can pick from this writings. Good job, such a mind!

Ps. I hope the blow of city breathe finds you well.

The idea of you and me,
us breathe the same city air excite me.

That when I walk down the pavement,
Or sipping coffee at some corner,
Or waiting for my bus to arrive,
Or simply strolling around,

I may cross path with you – left my stomach uneasy.
Nope I’m not pregnant just this nerve thingy.

And I wonder what will happen.
Will neither of us embrace how faith put it bless upon us.
Or will it just become a simple hello-goodbye?

Either way,
As I step in to this city,
I know

Being in the same space with you has got me thrilled.

Sauran Kasih Pujangga Perjaka

Seorang pujangga perjaka menyaurkan kasihnya kepada seorang gadis,

Yang rupanya diukir oleh tangan pematung batu megah Dewa Dewi Yunani,

Yang rambutnya menarikan gemericik aliran tenang air pada terpaan angin
dan memantulkan berkas cahaya matahari yang paling lembut sinarnya.

Yang senyumnya ditenun dari jahitan dan benang sutra tipis
dari seekor ulat bulu yang tatkala nanti jika hidupnya panjang akan berubah menjadi kupu-kupu cantik beragam warna.

Yang lekuk tubuhnya diciptakan untuk dapat tepat pada tangan erat.

Yang dalam tiap langkah kakinya menggerakan tanah untuk memunculkan benih bunga.

Yang pada tiup hembus nafasnya meniupkan semilir ringan dan hangat hawa pagi.

Dan matanya memancarkan yang tiap mahluk dambakan, cercahan nafas kehidupan.

Adakah Sang Gadis mau menerimanya,

atau sadar akan hadirnya,

dan sauran kata atas eksistensi diri-Nya?

Nikmat ‘Kala Tinggi’


As you might or might not know, you barely find me sober during weekend.

Or any other casual day.


And wonder what she’s been doing? Sipping alone wine in her bed?

Well fellas I pleased my brain, visual need, and simply enjoying self thru this playlist.

Which is at its climax to be enjoy when you are not sober.

Sipping some booze or else.




Nb : thanks to Inner Chinc for giving such thrill, a 11 at night swimming and 12 hitting club like we completely sobber. And my baby kid from Cambodia that approved and giving intensive of this playlist. Stay alive guys!

Kala Tinggi

Linen Memoir

I go to bed early today

No, I’m not that tired

Just somehow the bed attracts me to sink within, between virtues and reality.

As I turn my bluetooth speaker on,

Miguel is on playing. Coffee is echoing sweetly in my room.

I open my bra and toast it anywhere. My chest has suffer enough.

As I lay my head and snug my pillow with new linen,

I got all my nerve on sting and thrilled all over my body.

So, we use the same softener?

And geez how much flashes this smell has brought me into.

I was partly sober, how much drink I had before?

And pain, yup I did fall and thanks for catching me.

I was so in between, the severe pain in my head and struggle to function in such noon,

As I felt tender stroke of firm hand reaching my body in to vanish the space between your beard and my hair.

I was aware of what happen, and in fact, I’m loving it.

The reach was more than just tender, it turns to grab and attempt to make one single body in a bed.

I turned my head to grab more vivid look of you.

Hmm nope just your beard.

And sunlight hitting thru curtain shamelessly.

And I choose to sink in your wrap.

Laying all my head to your chest.

And you pulled me more, and more, closer.

I chill.

As the warmth remind me how true your arm give me.

I turned my head again.

And we both knew where it leads.

It all started from small peck.

And tender kiss.

Rolling over on of each other.

To roughly passionate intimacy.

Ended by warm snug.

Warmth of your arm wrap my body, one I cannot forget.

And I’m not quite sure is the spin you gave me,

or just gravity and rotation of planets,

Sun started fading away.

And we both tucked away, again.

I sniff the new linen of my pillow.

Such harmony it stimulates to my brain.

Awaken all single movement of Monday.

Categories Xx

Pelecehan di Jalan. Gak habis pikir gue sumpah.

Hari ini, Senin, gue baru menjalani interview di suatu perusahaan di Palmerah.

Seberes interview, gue pesen Uber ke GI dan menunggu di halte pinggir jalan sambil menggunakan masker. Ya kali ya bok di Jakarta pinggir jalan kagak pake masker. 

Seraya menunggu for approx 10 mins, kalo lagi gak liat HP, gue liat sekitar as in jalanan dan penggunanya.

Dan, terhitung sebanyak 2 pengguna kendaraan bermotor mengklakson yang diarahkan ke gue diikuti dengan tatapan om senang ngajak ena dan seringai 3 jari.

I cannot be more bewildered.

Gue berpakaian terbuka nggak. Like setelan wawancara aja gimana sih. Menunjukkan sensualitas apalagi. Pake masker. And yet for 10 mins in my life there are still, people of disgrace perform disrespect manner towards a human being as in I am an object at stall on the street that has no feeling when I receive such act. 

Dan pengalaman ini bukan kali pertama gue dapatkan dari orang2 direspectful cem gini. 

But this, di siang hari, dengan gue yang sama sekali tidak menontonkan lekuk tubuh dan wajah, I received such act. 

I cannot be more bewildered.
Kalo masih ada orang yang victim blaming atas perlakuan disgraceful kayak gini, sini. Berantem sama gue dan jutaan manusia lainnya yang mendapatkan perlakuan serupa tanpa ada pikiran ataupun upaya untuk diperlakukan seperti ini.

Because you, bigot part of universe, asking for it. 

Maaf2 ae nih.

Bgst What is Today

Selasa pagi.


Selasa pesan Uber untuk pergi.


Uber datang, supir tersenyum. Uber datang, memberi helm.

Uber bertanya kemana.

Saya jawab tentang arah tujuan.

Uber bertanya : “Suaminya nggak nganter Bu?”



Saya hanya bisa diam.

Bangsat he hit me twice.

First, anjir aing bahkan baru 5 bulan legal age karek ge lulus geus ditanya suami wae.

Second, FAK muka aing se settle itu hah? Hah? HAH?



Lalu psikotes. Saya mencoba pernasiban lah pokoknya di suatu PT. Psikotesnya gak ngukur tingkat intelektualitas aja anjir ini menguji emosi like FREAKING 4 PART OF TEST and one of em contain FREAKING 9 SUB TESTS WITH APPROX 180 QUESTIONS.

Mabok gak lu.

Itu muka orang yang keluar ruang psikotes isinya huruf, angka, gambar kubus yang diguling-guling, sama tatapan nanar melihat kehidupan.

Dan salah satu bagian tes-nya ada yang disuruh menggambar gitu kan. Ada 2 hal yang epic skenario.


You know how much I love erotica art.


Jadi satu bagian, membuat gambar dari suatu part of unfinished shape. Shape nya tuh kayak setengah lingkaran garis putus-putus. Otak udah ngebul tuh, kreatifitas udah minimum to none, dan barely functioning. Tau apa yang terlintas di benak saya untuk digambar?

A dick.

2 balls and its tower. Aing udah semelayang itu.



Suatu bagian lain pula, disuruh menggambar figur manusia lengkap dan ngasih keterangan tentang gambar ini.

Itu assignment terakhir dimana I barely functioning.

And I love erotica art.

I freaking gambar sensual girl naked (gak pake baju, tapi gak gue kasih detail nipple atau bush nor a single linen – heels doang) lagi nari bahenol dengan gelas di 2 tangannya.

Keterangan? Seorang wanita sedang menari dan minum di suatu pesta.


Sekian, Selasa 18 April.